curly gray hair

Tina’s SparklingSilvers Story!

 I know Tina for about an year now, she is adorable and holds a positive online presence on Instagram grey hair community. You can find her on Instagram at @tinacclark687

I was super excited when Tina agreed to share her goinggrey journey! She has one of the most beautiful grey hair and is on her way to embrace her curls.

What was your age and your thoughts when you get your first grey hair?

I was in my early 20s when I found my first gray hair. There was no question I would dye and cover up those grays. I strongly believed, at that time, that gray hair equaled old, and I was absolutely certain I wasn’t old.  I actually thought I would live forever, without ever getting old. Ah, the blissful ignorance of youth  (errrr, I mean… “innocence” of youth). 

gray hair transition story
Coloured hair...

 Did you ever dye your hair? At what age, and for how long?

Absolutely, I dyed my white shining strands back to my dark charcoal color as soon as I found them! I was in my early 20s when I started dying my hair, and I really enjoyed it at first. Dye coats the hair cuticle and lays it flatter – at least that’s what my hairdresser told me.  So, the dye seemed to really help calm my hair, even when I used boxed color, and was easier to style. But,that deep, rich, vibrant color didn’t last long. It faded to an orange tinge quickly, and I didn’t like that. It was just not attractive against my skin tone. But I continued my dutiful dye jobs for about 26 years.  

When and why did you think of giving up dye?

Around the time I started noticing “gray hair” as a fad, I considered letting my silvers grow out. I had been covering my roots every two weeks, but my silvers could be seen only days after my color. The silvers were screaming to be seen. 

one year 1 growing out gray hair curly
One year of grow out

 And, seeing how much of a trend gray hair was becoming, I thought I wouldn’t look so odd or out of place, that I could blend in, and that it might be the right time to grow it out. 

What was your way of going grey? (Pixie, Cold turkey, Highlights, Lowlights)

Initially, I went to the salon to blend.  I even tried toners at home to blend the faded dye; but any attempt always faded to an ugly orange.  

going gray in 50's curly gray silver hair woman toning silver

       “This pic is from May 17 – the day after “toning” it with an at home toner.  You can see how much the toner blended the yellow from the previous pic, but this was actually “breaking my base” – meaning it lightened my new growth color of my dark strands, which were eventually fading and turning my hair an orange tinge. “

All that upkeep, trying to blend, and disguise the grow out, just didn’t work for me.  After a salon job in May of 2017 (that set me back to “square 1”), I decided to just go cold turkey. I left it alone and let it grow!  

“This pic was May 17  – right after my last salon visit.  IT was such a god awful cut, you can see the bottom left and right photos were actually waking up the morning after my disastrous cut.  It was horrific.  I could style it and make it presentable, but this was the worst hair cut and blend job I had ever received.  It really felt like I started over – back at square 1. “

curly and gray growing out gray hair
gray hair transition story
"You can see how much of my gray was actually dyed over from the May salon visit. This was my cold turkey phase"
going gray in 40s silver curly hair woman
This was about 7 months of grow out
Big chop natural gray curly hair
"May 18 - my big chop - I cut off almost all the dye - I just had a few dyed bits on the ends, mostly in the back. But, this is when I felt my transition was completed"
gorgeous gray hair transition story
"June 18 - that big chop is slowly growing out, but I was so happy to see my natural color, and I really liked it! "

Any inspiration online/ real life?

I perused Pinterest for photos of gray-haired women who were absolutely stunning!  And, all of those beautiful photos of women who were still vibrant, still glamorous and still just gorgeous made me think I could do it too!  Why not? 

Any experience that you think is unforgettable while growing out your greys?

The most unforgettable lesson was this:  any negative comment I received was never about me.  It was about the one who was making the negative comment.  Most remarks rolled off my back, and I was unbothered.  One comment, though, really irked me because it was overtly insulting. Working through that mentally, realizing that the insult did not belong to me, and arriving at a place where I was completely unbothered by it, has been quite an unforgettable lesson!  So, I’m good

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How do you take care of your silvers? Any product recommendations?

Hands-down, my favorite product for my silvers is Blond Brilliance.  It’s an ash toner conditioner.  I use it almost every wash:  with my shampoo;  with my conditioner;  even “as” my conditioner.  It is sulfate and paraben free and is CGM-approved.  It works well for me.  

After going grey, did you think of changing your styles? (makeup, wardrobe, accessories)

The color of your hair definitely affects what makeup and clothing colors look good.  I’ve oftentimes had to adjust my makeup after a hair color appointment.  And, it’s no different going gray, except growing out my gray gave me a PERFECT color match for my skin tone!  As for clothing, I still favor black and white; but I’ve become a bit more bold with colors.  My jewelry has remained platinum or silver. 

Your major support during transition?

My inspiration was drawn from Pinterest.  I transitioned before joining Instagram, and I wasn’t really active on social media.  I rarely posted anything.  And although I had various social media accounts, I just visited for interesting content.  I used those accounts similarly to the way I may use websites – to gather information that I found interesting to read.  And then … I found Instagram!  This has been an overwhelmingly positive flow of inspiring accounts – Inspiration after Inspiration!

gray silver grey hair transition story curls curly hair

How do you feel after transition?

I feel free.  For me, there’s been such a relief in that freedom, a feeling of deep appreciation as I grow to accept the natural way my hair, skin and body are changing. I don’t mean letting myself go, but rather keeping the same indulgent, self-care practice that I’ve always had, but in a more purposeful and deliberately healthy way, and appreciating how much my body, mind and spirt have supported me through life.   And that….in and of itself… feels absolutely perfect to me! 

Any message for women aspiring to going grey?

As long as you are alive, you are aging. Everyone is getting older.  And if you’re lucky, you will too! Going gray is a choice, a preference, its not for everyone.  For me, the choice to go gray was relieving myself of a social expectation that I no longer felt obliged to meet. When I realized that I didn’t want to any longer, the only permission I needed was my own. When you’re ready, you will know. You don’t NEED hair color to be beautiful!  It’s true:  our bodies change, our ideas change, our looks change… and I’m growing more and more confident as I relinquish the impossible belief that I need to hold on to youth forever! 

natural gray hair transition story natural gray silver curls curly girl

 This blog has been created to give voice to the women around the world embracing their natural grey hair. You can be one to boost their thoughts and experiences by sharing this post. Thanks!

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